Mystery of the Wax Museum (1933) & House(s) of Wax (1953 & 2005)

So I did three things this week. Of course I did more than just three things. (A week is a long time--a person does all manner of things in a week.) What I mean is there are three deadmans-related things I did, which bear bringing up here at The Brain. The three things I did was to watch three movies--three associated movies (kinda like on Sesame Street).

You read the post title, so you already know what movies I watched:

1. House of Wax (1953)
2. House of Wax (2005)
3. Mystery of the Wax Museum (1933)

Full disclosure, that list feels weird to me because it's in neither ascending or descending order. But it IS in the order I watched the movies so I'm sticking with it. (The pain, the pain of mixed-up lists! I will survive.)

Now it's no secret my mind is a Comparing one and, being recently turned on to 1953's House of Wax by the hard working podcasters over at Decades of Horror: The Classic Era, I found myself scratching an itch to visit/revisit the movie and its film-siblings. And three movies in a week's time is nothing if not a fine excuse for a mini multi movies post, so here we are (with a mini multi movies post). Nothing too in-depth--just posters and a few random-y thoughts on each.

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House of Wax (1953)

So I watched this one first, and guess what? It's a seriously creepy little film. Certainly more creepy than the uninspiring movie poster here would have you believe.

And you know what else? It's one I've never watched all the way through until this very week. (How did that happen, you ask?) Well, it happened because I've never sought it out, being more of a creature feature guy and none too keen on movie psychopaths in general. Of course I'm familiar with the film, having read about it and caught bits on TV over the years, but sitting down to it this week has me quite sure I'd never seen it beginning to end.

At any rate, the movie's got a lot going for it. Vincent Price, for one thing, and backed by a solid cast. The plot's basically about "a disfigured sculptor who repopulates his destroyed wax museum by murdering people and using their wax-coated corpses as displays." (So says Wikipedia; so say we all.)

Nothing supernatural or monster-y going on with that plot, but you gotta admit "wax-coated corpses" is a pretty creepy premise all by itself. Anyway, the movie's beautifully shot, the story plays out nicely, and the whole thing builds up a satisfying level of tension as it moves along toward its climax. All in all, it's an above average 50s horror film, in my (reasonably) humble opinion.

Truth be known (and speaking of reasonable opinions), this is really a four brain movie. Only reason I didn't go there is, like I said, I'm not a fan of movie psychopaths--and even an above average one just isn't my cup of tea. As tea goes, it was a good cuppa but with my own predilections in mind, I went ahead and gave this four brain movie just:

THREE AND A HALF WAXEN-MUMMIFIED BRAINS

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House of Wax (2005)

I watched this one next and, unfortunately, it's one I had seen in the past. I don't remember if it was in-theater or a home-rental.... Must've been a rental--can't imagine having sought this out in a theater. Anyway, about all I remembered until my re-watch was that I hadn't cared for it much.

With memory now painfully refreshed, I can tell you exactly what I didn't like: it has a lazy script which swaps out engaging plot for sadistic gore and torture, delivers not an ounce of creepiness, and very little suspense. (Again, my (reasonably) humble opinion.)

This film is far from a direct remake of the 1953 film, in spite of sharing its title, and it's a fair example of why I generally steer clear of slasher flicks. That's right: the movie takes an above-average 50s horror film and turns it into run-of-the-mill-slasher-fare. Blech. (Blech, I say!)

So anyway, the plot is basically this (paraphrased from IMDB): "A group of friends on their way to a college football game falls prey to a pair of murderous brothers in an abandoned small town. They discover the brothers have expanded upon the area's main attraction, a House of Wax, and filled the entire town with wax-coated corpses." Many killer hillbilly stereotypes and hi-jinks ensue.

I will say the film had some fairly impressive visual effects going for it, though. And I thought Elisha Cuthbert and Chad Michael Murray gave a nice performances. Not their fault the movie sucked rocks.

ONE UNIMAGINATIVELY RETREADED BRAIN

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Mystery of the Wax Museum (1933)

You know, this is a tiny bit disturbing to me, but I'm going through Fay Wray's filmography online and not seeing anything besides King Kong that I remember actually having watched. (That can't be right, can it?) I remember seeing her in a few Perry Mason episodes... and I might've watched The Most Dangerous Game back in the day. Well, I've now seen her in this film, so that makes at least two (if not three) in my pocket. Still, I need to get busy....

At any rate this wax-movie easily has the coolest theatrical poster of the group, in my opinion. I just like that Art Deco look it has going on. Classy.

And apparently this was one of the very last films to feature Two-color Technicolor Process 3, using B&W film behind red and green filters. From what I read the public wasn't too enthralled with Process 3's look, but I thought it made this particular movie hauntingly beautiful to watch.

Can't say the plot flowed anywhere near as well as the 1953 film's did, and I honestly think that second film was better in most every way (sorry Fay). Best thing about this 1933 version? Glenda Farrell--she totally stole the show. Worth a watch just to see her energetically hard-boiled reporter manically bounce around the screen.

So yeah, I quite enjoyed this one, even if for mostly historical kinds of reasons--fun to see the two color process, enjoyable if dated performances, interesting pre-code content, etc. Not up to par with 1953's remake, though, so it's getting:

THREE RED AND GREEN TECHNICOLOR BRAINS

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Now, here's something I didn't do this week--I didn't read the short story these films all originated from--seems it was never published. Which didn't stop me from poking around, trying to find a copy of the thing. Sadly, not a shred of luck to be had there. The story was "The Wax Works" by Charles S. Belden. Apparently the guy also wrote a play called The Wax Museum (had to be related, right?) which was also never produced. Maybe the 1933 film was an amalgam of the two efforts (he said, purely guessing). Either one would be a fun read.

Alright I'm done. I was gonna tell you about that time I was a little kid and visited a wax museum with my folks and a guy dressed as a Keystone Cop pretended to be a wax statue and then pretended to start tipping over when my brother and I went up and touched him, with my folks standing back and (in on the joke) laughing all the while.

Desperate Dan: Mom! Help! It's tipping over! Help us!
Mirthful Mom: Oh no, son. You got yourself into this; you've gotta get yourself out!

Scarred for life.

Well, I guess I did kind of just tell you about it. But not in as much detail as I'd have liked. And without the picture of all of us in our seventies-garbed glory, gathered round a waxen Frankenstein's Monster, from that same visit. Maybe another time. I'm feeling done with this post, riiight..........

..........NOW!